"Tis the season to buy dollies,
Fa la la la la la la la la;
Model trains and miniature trollies,
Fa la la la la la la la la;
Designer jeans and holiday apparel,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la;
Madison Ave. has us over a barrel,
Fa la la la la la la la la - aarrgghh!
(to be moaned, dirge-like, to the tune of "Deck the Halls")
If you feel like substituting similar words to the traditional Christmas carol, you have probably been assailed by the plaintive pleas of offspring beguiled by television, stores, and towering billboards "selling" Christmas.
Seductive advertising directed at children is a dilemma for adults, especially during the holiday season, when children's expectations run high and parents feel committed to buy.
Eventually the issue comes down to deciding when and how we will say no to our children's excessive demands. Most of us have limited resources. Realizing that saying no is an important part of setting limits and establishing values does not solve the problem of selecting the best way to do it. We would prefer to be reasonable rather than arbitrary in our denials, conciliatory rather than autocratic in our delivery.
Dr. Steve Shelov, professor of pediatrics and director of pediatric education at Albert Einstein College of Medicine at Montefiore Medical Center, New York, feels that parents' first concern should be their children's health and welfare. For young children, Dr. Shelov cautions against toys with sharp edges and points or small removable parts, and holiday treats like hard candy, peanuts, and gum that can be choked on. "You'd be surprised what children put in their mouths," Dr. Shelov explains. "I don't mean to be alarmist, but we had a fatality with a youngster who aspirated a deflated balloon."
Clothing, stuffed toys, and puppets should be checked for flammability and toxic dyes. Playthings with rungs, bars, or holes should be checked to detect if little heads or bodies could get stuck.
Subtly harmful toys
Saying no is easy if you know a plaything poses a danger to your child. Physical hazards are most obvious, but parents may feel some gifts have more subtle harmful effects. Such gifts include toy guns, sexy clothes, makeup, or even highly competitive games.
For product information you can consult consumer magazines, parents groups, friends, pediatricians, and the Better Business Bureau. Also look at the product yourself. It may bear cautionary labels in small print (for example, "not recommended for children under three years of age"), or it may just look vicious.
Another consideration is product quality and durability. Hadassah Bennett, an educational psychologist at the Learning Center of the Jewish Board of Family and
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