Wasn't it Mark Twain who once called German "that awful language"?
Today he would shake his shaggy head and nod approvingly, as has many a traveler these days, over such German sentences as "Es regent Cats-und-Dogs," or "Das ist nicht up-to-date," or "Fly nonstop nach New York"--not to mention German-English inventions like das Popcorn, die Stripteaser, das Musical, der Star, ein Thriller, das Happy End, ein guter Gin-und-Tonic and der Lemonelime Drink [sic]. Three recent beauts that have popped up all over Central Europe are der Selfmademan, ein Shakehands and die Sex-bomb.
Call these linguistic hybrids "Deutschlish," Germenglish," fractured German, or whatever you will, but the new crop of words that have crept into the German language from across the Atlantic and the English Channel is enough for one speech expert here to comment with a Teutonic straight face: "Es ist der Trend!"
These days in Vienna when you throw out an English word in the middle of a German sentence, you are doing das In-Thing, because today German hat ein New Look. For tourists, the new German eliminates der Stress (pronounced shtress) and enables them to say good-bye to someone with the following perfectly acceptable sentence: "Auf Wiedersehen bis morgen, same time, same station!"
Deutschlish/Germenglish is everywhere is central Europe, creating its own kind of pollution. Here are some real nifties spotted in one day: a magazine recipe called Ungarisches Gulasch mit mixed Pickles; a solarium magazine advertisement telling you Braun is beautiful; ein sensationelles Programm im Night-Club mit Floor Show! And an ad in the paper about a new candy bar called Topset which is made with Karamel and Crispy Rice. And do you know where to go to buy this particular new confection? In my neighborhood, it's called "Der Groovy-Shop," which is not very far from another store that sells a mattress with the brand name Sleepy.
In the process of jumping onto the English bandwagon, the "new German" lingo sometimes manages to trample the adopted English. This is what you get that often throws a native American or Brit for a loop, for he may not recognize his own language anymore: ein Oldimer is not a person but an antique car; ein Stink Happening is a gas-mask drill in the German army; ein Slip is a girl's panties; ein Selfmade is homemade cake; ein pony is not a small horse or a girl's ponytail but the bangs on her forehead; ein Drink-in is something you invite a person to if you've met him on the street. In such a case you might be taking him into einen guten tearoom or to das Top-Restaurant!
Tourists who come to Vienna can't avoid Deutschlish at all, for in many public places it embraces you from all sides. Smack in the center of the city, you walk a few hundred yards in either direction along the pedestrian zone and you come across signs that announce the Chattanooga Snack Bar Espresso, which is right next door to the Paper Box, which is not far from My Market, which is near Reiseburo City, which is just a hop to Parkhaus City, which is in the vicinity of the Ruttner for Men Giftshop. But the star of Vienna's downtown Deutschlish décor is the dress shop that calls itself (are you ready for this one, mein Herr?): People Love Maly's Lemon. No one that I know of has been able to figure that one out.
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